A time of year for connection, reflection,
and gratitude...

As we immerse ourselves in the holiday season, I've noticed three things that feel so warm and lovely. I find everyone around me more open to connecting, sharing their reflections and brimming with gratitude. I love it. Whether it is a phone call (yes, talking on the phone), making time for a visit, or even carving out experiences to share, this year is full of meaningful connections. But what exactly is a meaningful connection? According to communication and vulnerability expert Brené Brown, "language is our portal to meaning-making, connection, healing, learning and self-awareness...research shows that language does more than just communicate emotion, it can actually shape what we're feeling...it speeds and strengthens connections in the brain (Brown, 2021)." The more present we are in the moments we share with our friends, family, colleagues, and partners, the more conscientious and intentional we can be about the language we choose to share. I've noticed that to be more present, I am trying to create more presence and positive energy when I am around the people I love by turning my phone to silent mode, including putting it on do not disturb mode, so I have no interruptions. Small actions can have a big impact. What is one thing you do or perhaps one thing you can begin to do to be tuned into the conversations you are having?

I've also noticed that leading up to this holiday season, many of my friends are sharing their journeys with self-reflection. Validating self-reflection as being beneficial goes back a long time in history: great leaders like Rene Descartes, who coined the phrase "I think therefore I am," Buddha, Dalai Lama, A.A. Milne (creator of Winnie the Pooh), Socrates, Eleanor Roosevelt, and many others relied on the power of self-reflection. According to renowned Neuroscientist Stephen Fleming (2021), self-reflection shapes our lives, enabling our thoughts to turn onto themselves. We now know that the engine of self-awareness improves decision-making, helps us to think more clearly, and reduces stress. I have been using self-awareness practices for over 15 years. These reflective awareness practices have been helpful to me in many ways, including discovering things about myself, enabling and identifying positive attributes and values within me, letting go of attachments that are holding me back, creating space to move through difficult emotions, and more. Below, I share a few tips on how to engage in self-reflection.

Gratitude is considered a practice of wisdom that creates feelings of connection and joy and is proven to enhance our well-being (Dickens, 2017). Gratitude means appreciating all of the good things in life. The act of gratitude helps us to move away from our negativity bias, which keeps us focused on what we don't have in life. Our tendency with gratitude is to reach for the big things. A wonderful exercise is allowing ourselves to be grateful for all the little things, like when our feet touch the floor first thing in the morning, having a hot shower, tasting coffee/tea, and having puppy dog kisses. There are many beautiful ways to increase gratitude in our lives that can be inclusive and fun. I've included below my gratitude-building tips and a beautiful video. For those of you interested, much research has been conducted on gratitude. I have a wonderful research paper that dives into the accumulating research on gratitude as a foundational element to well-being by Emmons et al. (2019). Please contact me (send me an email @ jen@admitone.ca), and I will share a copy.

This space is a place for connecting, sharing, and reflecting. I am grateful for all of you taking the time to pause and be here now. Thank you for being in this community.

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Tips for building self-reflection and gratitude into your life...

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1. Keep a gratitude diary. Try it for two weeks and make it fun; do it with your family, partner, or friends.

2. Try writing a gratitude letter once a week to someone you know, maybe someone unsuspecting, who has done something for you that you appreciate. Next, try writing a gratitude letter to yourself.

3. A few common ways to increase your practice of self-reflection include the following: journal writing using journal prompts (inquire for recommendations), meditation, a sharing circle with self-reflective and trusting conversation, and a daily checklist with self-reflective introspection notes. Curious to learn more? Ask for guidance.

A Few things are top of mind to share...

A GOOD READ: As I pulled together the content for this newsletter, I did a lot of reading. I have enjoyed discovering new literature, research papers and podcasts. For those of you who love to read, I want to share a beautiful book by Dr. Joe Dispenza. Breaking the Habit of Yourself. I read this one a while back and often reference it with my clients and in my community because his work is researched, valuable, and, without a doubt, transformational. Here is a link to learn more about it and get your copy on Amazon: https://www.amazon.ca/Breaking-Habit-Being-Yourself-Create/dp/1401938094​

WORTH LISTENING TO: Do you enjoy podcasts or audio experiences? I like to immerse myself in a good one from time to time. Check out the latest episode of our podcast, called Groupies. Be prepared to chuckle or laugh out loud. Here is a link to The Admit One Radio Hour: https://linktr.ee/admitoneradiohour​

SOMEONE I'M FOLLOWING: I recently discovered Andrew Huberman, and I'm hooked. I grabbed his bio from his website: Andrew Huberman, Ph.D., is a neuroscientist and tenured professor in the department of neurobiology and, by courtesy, psychiatry and Behavioural Sciences at Stanford School of Medicine. He has made numerous significant contributions to the fields of brain development, brain function and neural plasticity, which is the ability of our nervous system to rewire and learn new behaviours, skills and cognitive functioning. His podcast and YouTube channel are fantastic, educational, informative, and objective. Here is a link where you can find him: https://www.hubermanlab.com/podcast​

Monthly Mindful Meditation

This month, I have been contemplating how I want to feel, what's important to me, like my values, and the changes coming for me in 2025. In this self-reflection and journey of exploration, I enjoy using different types of meditation to help me explore. One I particularly love is a guided vision visualization meditation. Here is one I recently created for one of my programs, and I would love you to enjoy:

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Coming in 2025...

In 2025, a new section in this newsletter will be dedicated to Double J Strategic Coaching and Consulting. Find information, get amazing resources, and learn about the world of living and enabling change through people, processes, and technology.

With gratitude,
Jen James
jen@admitone.ca
​https://www.doublejstrategic.com/​

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References

Brown, B. (2021). Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience. Random House.

Dickens, L. R. (2017). Using Gratitude to Promote Positive Change: A series of Meta-Analyses investigating the Effectiveness of Gratitude Interventions. Basic and Applied Social Psychology, 39(4), 193–208. https://doi.org/10.1080/01973533.2017.1323638

Emmons, R. A., Froh, J., & Rose, R. (2019). Gratitude. In American Psychological Association eBooks (pp. 317–332). https://doi.org/10.1037/0000138-020

Fleming, S. (2021). The Power of self-reflection. The New Scientist, 250(3333), 36–40. https://doi.org/10.1016/s0262-4079(21)00794-6

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