Change is all around us...managing and living change takes practice, work, commitment and resources...

I have dedicated my career to helping people manage and live with change. At a young age, I was encircled with it personally and professionally. I suffered deeply, physically and emotionally. I found the path to managing change difficult, under-resourced, and confusing. It is why I wanted to make it easier for others to navigate. During my adolescent years and twenties, I spent a significant amount of time struggling to find my path forward and navigating through change. Like many of us, I was facing many problems all at the same time: a smoking addiction, mental health concerns - diagnosed with anxiety and mild depression, a physical breakdown in my body, and grief. I was unsure how to figure it all out, and the complex emotions that came with it. It was at that time that a wonderful person on my care team pointed me towards Mindfulness, and specifically a Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) program. Through the program, I began to discover the power of change. When we open ourselves to possibility, we can find new ways to change our path forward. This was one of the many opportunities in my life where I chose to say "yes", and I am grateful that I did. As a result, it changed the course of my life forever, introducing me to new friends, a new community, and a changed mindset that helped me heal and recover. Change is a choice. To make informed choices, it is essential to educate ourselves and enhance our self-awareness. Let's do that together. I am going to share a bit of history about change and educate more about the Transtheoretical Model of Change (TTM), commonly referred to as the Stages of Change. Before I jump in, let's clarify:
​Why is it important to understand the theory or the Stages of Change?
​1. Naturally increases your self-awareness. This means you will better understand where you are at by identifying which stage of change you are in and what it means so you can support yourself better with care, resources, and meaningful next steps. Self-awareness encourages reflection, allowing you to identify past attempts at change, potential relapses, and opportunities for moving forward, removing barriers and obstacles as you do.

2. Motivates and creates clarity. Knowing the stage of change is proven to motivate by increasing knowledge of how to move forward, why it's essential to take the next steps, and what you can do at each stage to move the needle. Motivation needs direction, and the stages of change provide that. Not only is it motivating, but it is clear, and clarity automatically reduces uncertainty.

3. Builds patience. Change often means a cycle of learning; two steps forward, one step back. Learning how to manage through relapse, challenge, obstacles, and failure is critical to building resilience, patience, and lifelong growth. Patience is a crucial practice for connecting with yourself and others.
(Eltayeb & Badri, 2022)
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​The Transtheoretical Model of Change (TTM)​
This model of change was initially developed in the early 1970s, and it has endured for a reason: it is easy to understand, and research indicates that it is effective in practice (Rahimi et al., 2019). For this conversation, I am going to share an overview. If you have any questions or would like to learn more, please do not hesitate to reach out to me directly and/or join our community sharing circle on Monday, September 29th @ 7:30 pm EST.
The TTM involves six stages and can be applied to any size of change, from small to extra large.
​Stage 1: Precontemplation: Denial. This means that when someone is in this stage, there is either a lack of acknowledgement or a denial of the need for change. Often, a friend, family member, doctor, therapist, etc., has identified the need for change, and you are unwilling to believe them.

Stage 2: Contemplation: Indecision. You are becoming more aware of the change, but feel uncertain if you should change. There could be a sense of loss associated with the change. Creating a pros and cons list can be beneficial at this stage, and working with a therapist, doctor, or your support team can help you navigate this process.
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​Stage 3: Preparation: Decision. You recognize the change and are ready to take action. This is the stage of gathering information and facts about the change you want to make. You are preparing to make a change. There is a decision on how you will make the change, the approach you will take, the support you will need, etc. This is a gathering exercise.
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​Stage 4: Action: Action. You are actively changing at this stage. The decision is made, you have the plan in place, and now you are in progress. This may be a time you decide to build tracking tools, add in a support system for accountability, and begin to reference your past negative behaviours as being in the past.
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​Stage 5: Maintenance: Long-term planning. The focus shifts to long-term planning and sustainment. This is all about forward momentum, so there is a reduction in the chance of regression to old habits. This may involve changing your environment, strengthening your support system, creating more effective action plans, and managing stress proactively rather than reactively.

Stage 6: Termination: Fossilization. The old habit loses its appeal. There is no longer a thought or a desire to go backward. Depending on the habit, it may take a while to reach this stage; there is no specific timeline.
(Moore, 2021)

The stages of change enable you to create opportunity and possibility. I hope you find some light in change.

Tips for creating change:

1. The best first step in creating change is identifying where you are in the stages of change and then sharing it with someone you trust.
2. Try setting a goal. I love to use SMART goal-setting as an approach to increase accountability and the likelihood of achieving my goals. S- specific. M- measurable. A-achievable. R-realistic (or relevant, depending on who you ask). T-timebound. Tip: remove uncertain language like maybe, try or try my best, should, might... Here is an example: Starting Monday, September 22, I will begin to incorporate a self-compassion meditation into my meditation routine to be kinder to myself. Now you try.
3. Lean on your support system. Change is difficult, and it is even harder when you try to do it alone. Please take a moment now and write down all of the wonderful people in your support system; it's not about how many, it's the quality they deliver. Reach out to one person today and talk to them about the change you want to make and how you feel. Tell them what you need.
4. Create your change vision. Try doing it in a way that makes sense to you. Here are a few ways you can do it: write it down, brainstorm, create a change vision board using images, photos, cutouts, etc., or dictate an audio recording of your vision. There is no right or wrong, just what you see, what you want, what inspires you, and what you believe is possible.
5. Create a family feedback wall. Get your family in on the action. Build meaningful, trust-building, and honest communication together about the changes you are facing. Find a space that is easy for all of you to access; it can be physical or digital, and post questions to each other, ideas, reactions, or anything else that comes up around the change you are experiencing together. Discuss it during a set time, like over dessert once a week.

Monthly Sharing Section...

NEWS TO SHARE: My doors are OPEN and I am officially a Registered Psychotherapist (qualifying). My practice focuses on helping adult individuals and couples navigate change during later-life transitions. If you or someone you know is interested in learning more or booking an initial FREE consultation, please reach out to me at jennjames@advocatinghope.ca
There are limited spaces available for online and in-person.

SOMETHING I'm reading and recommend: My husband recently bought me a gift that has connected me back to what I love to read the most, poetry. I wanted to share with you the beautiful works of Rupi Kaur. You can find her compilation of poetry in her book Milk and Honey or The Sun and Her Flowers: https://rupikaur.com/pages/all-books I read a new poem each night before I go to sleep. She is a wonderful writer.

SOMETHING I'm listening to and want to share: I have spent more time this month reconnecting to guided meditations. My life is full, sometimes overwhelming, and I recognize that I need to create space to reduce stress, cultivate self-awareness, and reflect. I enjoy listening to others guide me on a journey through self-compassion and mindful awareness. My favourite app for that is Centre for Mindfulness Studies: https://www.mindfulnessstudies.com/​

Monthly Mindful Meditation

This is a fav of mine. A meditation moving through change. It is approximately 10 minutes. Enjoy. Depending on your email, you can click the button or enjoy the embedded link.

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With gratitude,
Jen James
jen@admitone.ca
​https://www.doublejstrategic.com/​

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References

Eltayeb, S., & Badri, A. (2022). Women mental health status and behaviour change during the COVID-19 in Sudan. Heliyon, 8(5), e09358. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.heliyon.2022.e09358

Moore, L. (2021, September 14). Shifting Behavior with the ‘Stages of Change.’ Psych Central. https://psychcentral.com/lib/stages-of-change#6-stages

Rahimi, A., Hashemzadeh, M., Zare-Farashbandi, F., Alavi-Naeini, A., & Daei, A. (2019). Transtheoretical model of health behavioral change: A systematic review. Iranian Journal of Nursing and Midwifery Research, 24(2), 83. https://doi.org/10.4103/ijnmr.ijnmr_94_17